Lately, I’ve been wondering: Is empathy under attack? And if so, how do we as leaders, parents, citizens—humans—continue to lead with empathy in a world that sometimes seems to mock, punish, or politicize it?
So today, I want to pull back the curtain and talk about what it’s like to do this work, and why—despite it all—I continue to fight for empathy at work, in leadership, and in our culture at large.
Let’s dive in.
Empathy in the Crosshairs
In my work as a speaker, strategist, and author, I’ve spent more than a decade specifically championing the business case for empathy – many more decades leveraging it to achieve success for clients and better collaboration with colleagues. I’ve shared research, told stories, and interviewed brilliant minds on this podcast—all to illustrate how empathy is not just nice to have, but essential for high performance, innovation, loyalty, and trust.
And yet… something’s shifted.
In recent years, I’ve noticed more and more leaders—especially those in public life or at the helm of large organizations—start to shy away from empathy. Or worse, to dismiss it as weakness. As “soft.” As irrelevant in an era of AI, economic pressure, and culture wars.
And honestly? It’s disheartening.
Recently, my wonderful colleague Michelle Sherman of VAST Institute, who does work empowering leaders to embrace their true genius and lead a life of purpose to gain dramatic results, emailed me a brilliant piece by Robert Reich on Substack, titled “Trump, Musk, and the empathy bug.” In it, Reich explores how leaders like Donald Trump and Elon Musk are not just lacking in empathy—but almost proud of their detachment. He writes:
“Empathy is the capacity to see the world through the eyes of another and to feel what they feel… But in Trump’s and Musk’s cases, the empathy bug is entirely absent… They don’t even fake empathy. They don’t seem to care if they appear to care.”
He goes on to explain that this performative lack of empathy is actually part of their appeal to followers. That in a chaotic world, cruelty gets mistaken for strength.
And that… hit me hard.
My Empathy Crisis Moment
Here I am, traveling the country, delivering keynotes and workshops on empathetic leadership—and I start to wonder: Am I pushing a boulder uphill?
Every time I say things like, “Empathy boosts performance,” or “Empathy increases customer loyalty,” a small voice inside me whispers, Is anyone still listening?
Reich’s article inspired this thought: When our culture elevates those who mock others, who trade in blame and dehumanization, who treat workers or dissenters or entire communities as disposable—it feels like we’re slipping backward.
And yet—here’s the rub—I also know that millions of people are craving something different.
I hear it in the voices of the audiences I speak to, the leaders and HR professionals I partner with, the CEOs brave enough to ask me, “How do I lead with more heart without losing respect or results?”
So maybe we’re not so much fighting a losing battle, but a fractured one. Where two very different visions of leadership are colliding: domination versus collaboration. Command-and-control versus connection.
Redefining Strength
In The Empathy Edge, I wrote that we need to “rebrand empathy” as a strategic leadership skill. That it’s not about coddling or indulgence—it’s about courage.
And I stand by that.
Because in today’s world, it takes real courage to pause and listen instead of react.
To treat your team like people, not machines.
To sit across from someone who disagrees with you and still see their humanity.
Robert Reich calls empathy the “glue” of society. Without it, he says, we lose the ability to make collective decisions. We lose democracy. We lose decency.
And we cannot afford to lose those things.
So if you’re a leader wondering whether empathy is still relevant—let me assure you: it’s more relevant than ever. But we need to reclaim it. From cynicism. From spin. From weaponization.
We need to stop thinking of empathy as a “nice-to-have,” and start recognizing it as a critical operating system for leadership in the 21st century.
In fact, he further talks about how without empathy, our society just CANNOT WORK: This part of his article is particularly powerful.
“A society depends on people trusting that most others in society will have a modicum of empathy for others rather than take advantage of them. In this way, civic trust is self-enforcing and self-perpetuating, while civic distrust can corrode the very foundations of a society.
Polls tell us that many of today’s Americans worry that the nation is losing its national identity.
Yet the core of that identity has never been the whiteness of our skin, the uniformity of our ethnicity, or the commonality of our birthplace.
Our core identity as Americans — the most precious legacy we have been given by the generations who came before us — consists of the ideals we share and the obligations we hold in common. We are tied together by these empathic meanings and duties. Our loyalties and attachments, guided by empathy, define who we are.
If we are losing our national identity, it is not because we are becoming blacker or browner or speak in more languages than we once did. It is because we are losing the ties that bind us together, our collective empathy.
Musk and Trump typify what has gone wrong. Their most damaging legacies may be the erosion of the trust and empathy on which our society — any society — depends.”
What You Can Do to Amplify Empathy (Even When It’s Hard)?
So what can you do—right now—as a leader who wants to resist the tide of cruelty?
Here are three small but powerful steps to amplify empathy in our culture:
- Model It. You don’t have to be perfect. But when you listen first, admit your mistakes, or show compassion in a tense moment—you show your team that empathy is strength.
- Name It. When others dismiss empathy, push back. Gently, firmly. Say, “I think listening to understand is productive.” Or, “I’ve seen empathy increase our results, not weaken them.”
- Protect It. Cultivate spaces where empathy is valued—whether that’s your team, your family, or your community. Surround yourself with others who get it.
Because if we don’t protect empathy—who will?
Empathy is not weak. It is not naive. It is not political.
It is what allows us to build trust, resolve conflict, and create workplaces where people—and performance—can thrive.
And as Robert Reich so powerfully reminds us, when leaders lack empathy entirely, they lose touch with the people they claim to serve. They create fear, not loyalty. Silence, not innovation. Chaos, not progress.
I know it’s hard. Some days, I feel like a lone voice shouting into a storm.
But then I remember: I’m not alone. You’re here. Listening. Caring. Trying.
And that gives me hope.
So keep going. Keep leading with empathy—even when it’s unpopular.
Because empathy is not the enemy. It’s the antidote.
If you’re looking for support in building a culture of empathy and performance in your organization, check out what I can do for you. I’d love to help.
Stay kind. Stay courageous. Stay human.
Photo credit: Floris Van Cauwelaert on Unsplash
